Depression Demon
Growing up with something you can't explain is very difficult. You know you're different and you know you have more emotions than other people your age, but you haven't found an outlet to help control them. You've got social anxiety that keeps you in a shell and every time you try to escape the shell you are beaten back into it by the words or actions of another.
When you go to your doctor you can tell he cares very little about you. You can't get into relationships because your emotions drive people away. You have very few friends because most kids don't want to be friends with the one who is different or has a disorder.
I was fortunate to have two solid parents. But some children with ADHD are not as lucky. You can be in a room full of people, but you can't let your guard down because you see through them and understand they don't have the compassion it takes for you to do that. So even in a room full of people you feel alone.
Someone can tell you how much they care about you, but it means very little to you because you see inside their soul and you know they are not the person they pretend to be. You see all their ulterior motives. No one understands you because when you start talking your brain jumps all over the place. And your other classmates belittle you because you can't keep your thoughts organized enough to have a conversation about the simplest of things.
You fall into this deep state of depression, because you know you're different and no one understands you. Unfortunately, a great number of people with ADHD end up committing suicide.
Recipe for Disaster
Let's look at what we've got so far. We have a child who has been told he has a disorder. The child goes to a psychiatrist who couldn't care less about him, but to make it look like he does he tosses medicine after medicine at the symptoms. The child can't connect with anybody, can't relax and be himself anywhere. He's probably been held back a couple of times because he wasn't as fast as the other students, devastating his self-esteem and making him feel ashamed.
Now the internet is flooded with articles about ADHD and shootings, so even fewer people want to talk to him. Other students call him a mental case. Due to the social anxiety the student becomes quiet. When he starts talking no one understands him and he can tell most people think he's an idiot.
He might go home to family that cares about him or not. He might go home to parents that are too busy to listen to him. He might go home to a parent that punished him for showing emotions. He might have had parents that criticized him for crying. His parents may have told him to "man up" at emotional times in his life.
He is in a constant state of depression and he maybe only has one or two people he can talk to that have the compassion and truly understand who he is. Many days I came home from school and planned on taking my own life. Fortunately I had parents with good souls, and knowing how much they would miss me prevented it.
Are we really surprised when these children commit suicide or shoot up a school? I am not justifying these children's actions by any means – I have never once felt that harming another person would make me feel better. I credit that to the way my parents brought me up. But is it a surprise some of these kids have snapped?
The media is quick to point out that many of the perpetrators of school shootings were on ADHD medications, but they don't mention the other thing they have in common: most shooters have been bullied. Do you really believe in individual with social anxiety is going to be able to come forward and report school bullying? Is ADHD and its medication really to blame, or is it society, parenting, and the closed-mindedness of physicians?
I am not afraid to address these issues of ADHD and suicide, because I care very little what people who don't know me think about me. At the end of the day I am a father with ADHD raising two boys, one of whom has ADHD. If your child has ADHD, letting them see this article could make a big impact on them. I promise you most of them will be able to relate.
Unfortunately the majority of them will not tell you they do because they will not want to cause you any unnecessary worrying. They might even tell you it's wrong. They've got enough people thinking they are a mental case and will not want you to feel the same way. But the facts are the facts and the truth is the truth. This article will let them know they are not alone.
